What's in my Heart?
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Saturday suxxed really bad...
I've been trying all this while to be nice..
But i cant take no more..
If this goes on, my little boy would just grow up to become some useless ah beng like his dad!
Ever since birth, i told them i wanted to look after him.
But my in laws say no.. tt i need rest and they can handle it..
When we moved from Tampines to Bedok,
i told them i wanted Jerome in my room.
They said no...
Now Jerome is really close to them coz they wanna hog him...
They teach him the wrong things,
they say he's too young to be disciplined,
they teach him to talk back,
they say he's too young to brush his teeth...
Likt WTH!!!
Since they don't allow me to look after him,
I can only tell them how things should be done..
But do they listen????
NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm sick and tired!!!
Maybe i don't want a stake in any of this anymore!!!
I told Jason that if not for Jerome,
he'd be sleeping alone every night...
Told him that our love was over and that Jerome was the only string keeping us together..
Yet..
I hate what Jerome has become now.
Rude lil thing with a bad ass attitude to match..
Not forgetting the 'play mahjong' thing...
Am i ready to give him up?
Called Leo to pick me up that night..
Bought some beer and told him bring me to Tanjong Rhu..
*Ever since Alex first brought me there, i fell in love with the place..*
After find a nice spot, we sat, smoked, drank and analysized my problem..
He told me that no matter what, i should be the responsible adult..
talk to my parents and hear their views..
If things REALLY can't work out..
divorce is eminent..
But to fight for custody over Jerome..
"Jerome is not even three.. do u remember anything from when you were 1? 2? 3?.. say below 5?"
And he's right...
If i can pull Jerome away now,
i can still change his base foundation...
Jerome still has time to be saved!!!
Then comes the other problem..
Where do i stay?
All the rooms at home have been taken up..
At least if there was a spare room, this wouldn't be so difficult...
Worst case scenario...
Leave it all behind...
And pray Jerome would have his Mother's brains....
Be forever guilty I left my son in the hands of Monsters...
After a whole lot of talking and crying,
the need to pee overtook all other problems and we scrambled back to the car to drive to the nearest petrol station.
A public toilet has never felt so nice.... -_-"
VERY coincidentally, we saw Karen & Jeremy there at the ice-cream corner just after walking out of the toilets.. Chatted and all..
I honestly felt like going off coz i had also promised to meet Ray and YuZhong after...
But they decided on going to a Thai Pub... -_-"
So all of us dressed in shorts, berms, and t-shirts..
headed over to the Thai pub in Golden Mile for a round of drinks..
*The same pub Eugene(SanFeng) brought us to during the first company outing*
I've always like the atmosphere there..
The singers are good and their DJ's pretty awesome!!
Had some Singha Beer..
They actually taste pretty good...
One of our rare mild drinking nights =)
Home by 4..
Thanks Leo for everything!!
I feel blessed to have friends like him and Stephanie!! =)